ShAred MeMories

How thoughts affect our lives

‍How does thoughts are germinated ...from where they come when we r talking...is there some library or Google cloud of thoughts...

or we r receiver antenna who catches the frequency for which we tune ourselves .

are thoughts a form of energy  .....so it never ceases to exist....

.these were some  questions I have not got any conclusive proof till now....

but Imphal weather n serenity  has again rekindled these thoughts....

To make it simpler ...yes it's true that we gain knowledge through our studies ..n experiences..n observations...which helps us to make views n opinions about certain things...but ...people like me who talks non stop on all stupid topics from where these ideas keep on coming....

so I looked backed again to my psychology days ...n old books n new researches n tried to get some answers...

From where these thoughts come suddenly ...

from repository of thoughts travelling in space ....which means ...thoughts are omnipresent ..for centuries ..n they are  like energy which can't be destroyed but it only changes forms...

I feel for centuries thoughts are traveling ...n people having similar thoughts...or in present those who have shared memories...are able to connect to them by their decryptor in mind...n similarly when ever we think it gets encrypted...for some one to decipher it if s/he is having right codes for it....

Further based on requirement we translate sometimes into words...but most of time these thoughts kindles our emotions ....sudden thought of your old girl friend ...or a tough fight we have been ...n with thoughts our mind gives us emotional feelings as well as associated physiological rigours....so factually thoughts have power of real experiences...

This is my theory...but the practical aspect of it means that if we use this power of thought...we can connect with right people ..called as ESP extra sensory perception....I feel if we create shared memories...n then through thoughts try to relate with each other we can...it's more powerful then WhatsApp..or..video call as it has emotion attached to it....as in our lives shared memories ...n  thoughts are the only thing which makes us tick....

So let's create more shared memories....

IMPHAL DIARY..... ..STORY OF LIKING SOMEONE BY JUST CLICKING

Did you like my post

‍‍‍‍I know just by seeing my post ...most of you will click like button even without reading or commenting on it......

I have started writing blogs  to elicit responses n discussion on thoughts ...but time I post .....likes start coming...which seems without reading....

This post is postmortem of same ..n please don't like ..better read it...

‍‍One of the first things we all do ......in the morning is to check one's social feed. Depending on your poison of choice it could be Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp,Twitter, Tinder,  Snapchat or Linkedin. Whichever platform we’re on, one of the first check points is the ‘notification’ tab. ....

Has anyone liked something of my pictures..

Has anyone tagged me ....n so on....

It’s a habit we quickly get pulled into. It’s addictive. Have you ever stopped to wonder why it’s so addictive?

That little rush we get when your post gets more likes than normal? There is a reason for that rush. Dopamine.

 For every thumbs up or heart we get a little psychological high through a shot of dopamine. The more likes the more shots. The more shots we have, the more shots we want. And we’re in a loop. Scientists used to think dopamine was responsible for pleasure in the brain, but we now know that rather than create pleasure it makes us seek it.

People are more likely to engage with posts that have been endorsed/liked by a large amount of their peers — a follow the crowd mentality.

The amount of ‘likes’ we get generally depends on how many friends or followers we have and the mountain of social psychology that’s happening behind the scene. If you’re looking at the amount of ‘likes’ you get on a post as a sign of engagement, it’s worth knowing the reasons behind your ‘likes

Why do we want to be liked?

Facebook introduced their like button in February 2009 — nearly five years after launching. Ironically, Facebook’s founder Mark Zuckerberg didn’t ‘like it’. History indicates it took nearly two years for the ‘like’ button to get approval. How did we ever use Facebook without a like button? We all want to be liked right?

As social beings we like to talk about ourselves a lot. Either directly or indirectly. More studies indicate we talk about ourselvesnearly 40% of the time! When we start using our keyboard to talk this figure jumps to around 80%.

Why? Face to face communication is quick and occasionally awkward. We don’t have time to think of the words before they’re leaving our mouth. We speak from experience here. Talking online gives us time to think and words can be carefully selected to present yourself in the best possible light. The online space is something we can control.

We share our thoughts and interests primarily because we want to stay connected with the people we care about but also because we want to give others an idea of who we are. If our friends and followers like our posts we feel good. The more likes, the more dopamine, the better we feel.

“Likes are always an indicator of social standing....in mind of person who has posted

As someone who gets anxious and occasionally struggles with self-esteem, the amount of Likes on my posts can be both hugely uplifting or depressing.”

In putting a picture or comment on social media you’re opening yourself up to judgement. You’re making yourself vulnerable to the thoughts of others. If the post doesn’t elicit the reaction you’d hoped for it can hurt. As individuals  we’re seeking approval from our peers. When we get the approval everything is good..

. We feel good — we get a little dopamine hit. It’s why we keep going back for more.

And more....but what if  we don't get desired likes or in comparison lesser then our friends...then we start clicking likes blindly for everyone's posts ..with a thought that others also will do same...you scratch my back I will do same....

Is it scary.....let's be honest may be as an adult we may handle it but what about our kids...n presume some app brought dislike button ...what would happen to self esteem..

Pls understand like is factually a marketing tool by app developer...

by developing an understanding of how a customer wishes to be seen by their peers, brands can serve content designed to reinforce desirable perceptions and improve the likelihood of that customer engaging with such a post.... 

So friends you like..or not my post but please make you n your family aware about this concept of like...have more wonderful liking people around you....

IMPHAL DIARY...GODS N GODDESSES IN METRO JOURNEY

Gods n Goddesses in metro trains

‍‍‍Hey maa... Aaj I had darshan of devi maa in metro train... 

The devi with her only two hands was holding one bag in front other two 👜 in other hand ... 

N then she put mobile phone charger in socket n was talking with her divya ear n then she managed to take out her apple n was eating n phone was held between her ears n neck n from other.. Ohh maa water bottle came out

Whatever was happening in crowd devi kept using her weapon.... sorry meant mobile phone... 

I felt my life is complete today to see devi in human form....

Then I realized I find other sort of devi...devta ....rakshas....on metro..daily

 Just as a guide to identify them I will classify them for y

The mobile gyani

The most peaceful and harmless of the lot, they’re not bothered about anything that’s happening around them (not even their own kids!) the ganesha are found deeply engrossed in their  mobiles.... They can be seen in every corner and compartment of the metro. 

Devi selfie 🤳 queen

This type of devi is always decked up and in modern era called as selfie queens obsessing over themselves nonchalant of the hustle and bustle of the metro. The selfie formula is the same everywhere - take your positions, angle yourselves, insert pout and  click........

away from as far as the handallows....

So, instead of making faces at them.... Feel that you r dhanya as you r able to see their pout faces on metro itself.. 

Mohini..The gig

These devis giggle....laugh and chatter in high-pitched tones and riding the metro with them is like listening to FM channel radio mirchi...

Don't ask them to shut up as they will put you in a soup ... Just adore them

Couple Kaamdev n rati...lovers

This type of devi n devta can be seen entwined in each other all over the metro! They sometimes are so into each other, they don’t seem to notice how awkward it gets for others around them. If you spot one of these.... Either remember your time or close your eyes

Kumbhakarna..sleepers

Nobody wants to wake up (and confront) the sleeping giant; even if they are the types who are just pretending to sleep in the space reserved for the old or the physically challenged. These characters can be seen in a Metro on any route - if found just avoid them... 

Manthra... the adjuster

‘Thoda adjust karlo please’....

welcome the Manthra in metro

They squeeze in the tiniest of space they see and eventually leave your rear hanging in mid-air. They will sweet talk you into giving up your seat!

Indra dev..the musical 

These type of men or women are noisy and are often seen screeching into their phones, ‘can’t hear you

They can't  lower their volume, as these people think it’s cool n perfectly right to talk like this...

They make us part of their personal taste of music also as their favourite bhajan of Honey Singh tunes loudly and proudly .... 

Narada...the spy

These type of devi n devta love to spy or snoop around.... by peeping into their phones and just can’t mind their own business! Sit or stand at a distance from such people as they often turn into present era stalkers.... 

The Eternal watchman...always

S/he is...one who always occupies position near gate....no matter he/she has to board down at the terminating station...

The tired yodha

They’ll sit anywhere, anyhow, anytime. Where ever they can find a spot, they’ll put their bags and perch themselves there.. 

Shikhandi..man in ladies compartment

It’s a human tendency that when you’re told not to do something or go somewhere, you always want to do just that and so is the case with these shikhandi who always try their luck to get into the ladies compartment.

IMPHAL DIARIES...POOR MEMORIES ARE GOOD FOR HAPPY LIVING

Have you ever felt that you know the person but can't remember her/him..or we r not able to recollect an episode of life ...while our friends recall about it as it happened yesterday ....or people meet n say hi to you but you r not able to even place them in your life...

Generally people around us takes a very positive view of memories and the act of remembering: we esteem the study of history, we are expected to take photos to capture precious moments; we think that old injustices should be made good in the present; we promise not to forget old acquaintances ...when we r leaving school ...colleges..etc

But without denying the value of any of this,  we  need to do something else: 

                   ..... FORGET.......

Certain memories threaten to destroy the very existence of an individual – although it's bit extreme but certain memories r bad for present or future living...

If we held onto everything that had ever happened to us in all the multicolour vividness of the original event, we’d be overburdened with anxiety and sadness, we’d be continuously terrified and consumed with regret: we’d be driven to despair by all the meanness we’d encountered, all the stupidity we’d been guilty of and all the beauty and goodness we had lost. To have a poor memory belongs is related  to survival.

think if

animals would have memories then it would be killing all around......

We should remember only in so far as it actually helps us to live in the present. To the extent that memories assist us in forming our plans and avoiding error, they are valuable, but when memories function as obstacles to better lives, we should put our energies into the business of forgetting.

The best way to forget is not just time, but – more exactly – events. So as to separate ourselves from the things that haunt us, we have to ensure that we can lay down a dense layer of events between us and they; we need – in short – to make stuff happen.

This is particularly true after a bad breakup, when certain places, times of day and activities remain tightly linked to the past and constantly evoke it painfully:

– Whenever we see the old tea ad

..some building etc we are carried back to memories of cosy days n evenings spent there together.

– Riding our vehicles down the open roads triggers thoughts of energising trips we made there on balmy days.

We’re surrounded by emotional tripwires. Our heart breaks again and again.

We cannot, as we might at points want, get rid of the world in which the relationship once played itself out. We can’t burn the cushions or uproot the restaurant. To forget, we have to impose a new layer of experience on the things we associate with lost love. We should take a new group of friends to the restaurant, sit at side of the road  or get fresh acquaintances to hang out with us on the sofa. We have to reclaim the material of our life from the person who broke our heart.

With a new commitment to forgetting, we should recover some of the hope of the child and the fortitude of an animal.....

HOPE NOT TO FORGET THE MEMORIES IN THESE PHOTOS ...MISS U EVER....

IS VIRTUAL RELATIONSHIP...BETTER THAN REAL ONE

How far we have come from 

Having different meanings of roses ...

.to selecting cards at Archie's shop...

to finding out the difference between best friend...I like you ..to love you..

..n finally the first kiss...these are the shared memories we all cherish as we keep on growing

So does having virtual relationship stoppped or enhanced creating shared memories

 Nowadays we all  text—text... selfies...even wishing birthday n anniversary are through text n smileys ...does it is able to convey the emotion ...

. Many young people are now experiencing their first “romantic” relationship on their phones. Teenage couples begin texting each other intimately and voraciously often before they are even friends, texting things to each other that they would never (ever) say in person. Having a real life relationship with your friend is no longer a prerequisite for having a virtual relationship with him. ....or does people have time to spend...

Nowadays, when a person says s/he is “liking” someone, it generally means that s/he has someone with whom s/he texts around the clock.  It doesn’t however, mean that s/he talks to that person more (or at all) in real life.   Being part of a couple also doesn’t mean that you do anything in the world together, like go for ice cream or see a movie.

On their own, texting relationships might not seem like a big deal, but the challenges that they create is indeed a big deal. Virtual relationships stunt real relationships (and the skills they require).  The pseudo intimacy of the texting relationship preempts real intimacy, which then creates a divide that is difficult to cross.  The virtual romance happens at a pace and rhythm and with a hipness and ease that has little to do with real life romance or, for that matter, the emotional maturity of people... 

Adult relationships are also getting caught in the chasm between virtual and actual reality. After a first or second date, it is common for would-be couples to begin texting with a frequency, casualness, and intimacy that is at higher level of the relationship; they share their thoughts, feelings, and everyday experiences as if communicating with a best friend or maybe more accurately, a part of themselves. 

They share their lives, as well, without the discomfort or effort that a phone call or in person exchange might require. This  immediate intimacy then impedes the possibility of the relationship blossoming into something more real as the connection gets waylaid in a kind of texting purgatory: a fast-paced cool, pseudo-sexy.... relationship.

  Texting relationships feel in our control while real relationships often don't; we can be who we want in text relationships but not always in real ones.  

One can’t be as fabulous in person as in text.  And our friends can’t be as fabulous either, which means that the whole real life relating experience can become a kind of disappointment—ultimately lacking what the texting relationship can offer.  Once again, the real can’t compete with the virtual. 

I wonder, will the gap between our virtual and real life relationships grow so wide that we will opt to give up real life relationships altogether. Will there come a time when we no longer even pretend to want or need face to face interaction?  With the help of robotic technology, will future generations consider romance and courtship to be activities that happen entirely inside their devices?   

Virtual relationships may feel sexier, easier, cooler, and, in the short term, more pleasurable. ....but does it help in creating the shared memories...or it remains as textual memory kept in some cloud of WhatsApp or Google...whatever it is still it is better then nothing as you can connect to people for longer period in some real time ..